I’ll be the first to say it: I get writer’s block all the time. In fact, I’m pretty sure that 97 percent of writing anything is sitting down, realizing you have no idea what to say, and then falling down an internet rabbit hole instead. Rinse and repeat at least seven times before you get anywhere close to started. That said, I give myself the opportunity to succeed: I open up my laptop and wait. If nothing comes, I can always trust Pinterest for “blog post ideas”. Sure, sometimes they can be a bit generic, but there’s nothing wrong with a good list of how-tos or life hacks from YOUR perspective! That’s what makes you YOU.
However, I regularly see these suggestions (or some variants on the subject) for post ideas:
- Be organized and do this!
- 5 ways to cut that bad habit
- Simplify your life in three easy steps!
- X is hurting you. Here’s how!
- Be fit and healthy by doing these ten things!
Posting about those topics always makes me feel weird. Granted, I’ve dabbled in the occasional workout post and written a whole Glam Girl Manifesto on healthy hacks that models and influencers use to look and feel their best. But that’s all sponsor-tested, publicist approved by the goddesses that run the Kardashian empire (the devil works hard, but Kris Jenner works even harder). Who am I to tell you how to live your life?
This brings me to my main point: early on in high school, I stopped supporting the idea of the “guilty pleasure.” Maybe it was because I was teased for loving the Jonas Brothers, or enjoyed spending hours watching reruns of “That 70s Show.” At a certain point, I felt so sick of being told that what I liked was pablum, or stupid, or less than worth my time, or not worthy of being liked at all.
First of all, the people who say that certainly have a lot of nerve. I could go on and on about the inflated sense of self-importance, the superiority complex, that those kind of people have (and I’m sure there’s a research paper about it somewhere, if not thirty), but it doesn’t matter.
Secondly, one of the most wonderful things about this world is that all of us are different, and no two people are the same. There’s no wrong way to be happy. I think everyone gets one vice, and they shouldn’t have to feel guilty about it. If your way of unwinding after a long day is three episodes of “The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills,” then go for it! If you’re outside the intended demographic for Marvel comics but a new edition each month is what keeps you going throughout the week, then go for it! If you work out five days a week and eat a vegan diet 30 days, but that 31st day you need an ice cream sundae, I will go BUY YOU ALL THE LACTAID YOU NEED.
I feel like we’re all so quick to judge what people like. I gotta tell you, shutting down people’s passions just makes you a buzzkill. If you think someone’s hobby is weird, you should keep it to yourself.
Granted, there are limits to the “no guilt in guilty pleasures” rule. Your vice has to be something that makes you feel good in the short term, without having the potential to devastate you in the long term. Cracking open a cold one with the boys every Sunday is fine. Cracking eight cold ones three times a week? Not so much. Your vice shouldn’t be an inherent danger to yourself, and it definitely shouldn’t be a danger to the people around you (you need a new stress reliever if the way you relieve stress is by coming home and yelling at your family about it). Truly toxic vices are symptoms of a bigger problem, and indulging them is more like denial than a coping mechanism.
So that’s where I stand. I don’t think I can tell anyone that being tidy is better, being healthy is better, being organized is better. I think we all know that. I think that if we set our own expectations based on barometers that other people set, we’re setting ourselves up for failure. We should only be setting standards for ourselves to meet. Allow yourself to be your own judge and jury. We should all stop the shaming of other people’s indulgences. If we all enjoyed the same thing, life would be pretty boring! We’re in month six of quarantine, and being bored in the house and in the house bored just proves that life can get boring quickly. Have that glass of wine. Enjoy that Monday Night Football. Order the dessert. Just live your life the best you can, and remember that everyone else is going on their own journey. The best thing you can do is be supportive, and share what works for you in times of stress.
There’s nothing to feel guilty about an innocent recommendation!