Demi Lovato reemerges with a documentary, an album, and a new lease on life. I couldn’t be happier… I think?
Demi Lovato has been a constant in my life for almost half my life. No joke! I was watching Camp Rock on my iPod when I was a freshman in high school, 14 years old, and I’m 26 now. Through thick, thin, and everything in between, I have stood by her side.
When she was 18, she went to rehab for a multitude of issues, and I felt like everyone who hated on the squeaky clean Disney aesthetic turned on her without even a thought. I was so floored that people saw this literal child struggling and thought anything other than “I hope she gets better.” Demi Lovato made me feel like it was okay that I didn’t look a certain way, that I didn’t fit in with what was cool. So when she eventually got sober and began pushing out more music that felt authentic, I was overjoyed.
Cut to several years later, and Demi returned to rehab after overdosing, returning to drugs after seven years. I remember refreshing my phone constantly that day, waiting for news. Hoping for positive news. Praying for positive news. When they announced that she was conscious I was overcome. I didn’t even realize how much I needed her to be okay. I was just a fan, I couldn’t imagine what her family and friends were feeling. To this day I bet they wake up each morning thanking a higher power that Demi got another chance.
After 2018’s brush with death, Demi began to put her life back on track. In 2020, as quarantine set in, Demi began recording a new album to discuss her journey. On top of that, she began work on a corresponding documentary, to talk with full transparency about the events leading up to her overdose, and everything that happened after that. The album and the documentary share the same title: Dancing with the Devil. The album released last week, and the documentary aired on Youtube over the past three weeks, concluding today.
The first and final episodes had me sobbing. Hearing her talk about her relationship with drinking and drugs hit me hard. The way that she talked about her addiction, and hearing her parents talk about her ability to manipulate the people around her regarding food and substances, reminded me so much of my relationship with food. Obviously, I know that food won’t kill you short-term (I mean, you’d have to eat a LOT of cheeseburgers in one sitting to die from it), but too much food or too little food can cause long-term effects and eventually kill you (heart disease, Cancer, Diabetes, the whole 9). I know the comparison of poisoned apples and oranges, but it just hit me on a level that brought me down to earth for a while.
Demi certainly seems like she’s okay. Based on her documentary, she’s embracing herself fully, taking the good days with the bad days, and finding a balance and her way to happiness. That’s all I could’ve wanted for her. I still feel scared. Knowing how easy it is for me to lie about food, and thinking that Demi’s JUST as good at lying, worries me. She is so cool, and fun, and fearless. Even if she wasn’t fully transparent about her struggles, she’s always authentic. She and I are both bigger than our demons. We are worth so much more than that. We have so much more to offer. I may not be able to offer inspiration to millions the way that she does, but I still want to make some kind of an impact on the world, a positive one.
It all makes me want to try to get better. Maybe if Demi can find a good balance, I can too. We can be each other’s spiritual soul guides… in a completely normal, not stalker kind of way. I RESPECT BOUNDARIES.