Have I mentioned yet that I love Halloween? Once? Twice? Thrice? It might be my favorite holiday. There was a time in my life when I had “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown” fully memorized. What’s more fun than autumn crafts, costumes, and candy? You let me know.
I love horror movies. Who knows why? I’m the only one in my family who finds them fun at all times. I decided, what with trick-or-treats and Halloween parties not really being an option this year out of safety, I would sit down and watch some scary movies all month long!
I wanted to have a good combination of all decades and genres, and I think my choices for this month fulfills this desire! This is part one of a monthlong series of spooky movies, ranging from the classic monster legends to the slightly more fun dark and twisted comedies. I also leave room for the late nineties/early oughts of the past decade, because my appreciation for horror comes primarily from that era.
I think that of the 21 movies I’ve placed on this list, I’ve only seen five of them! The rest (including all of the ones from this week’s edition) are all new-to-me.
I divided the films up into categories:
- The Seventies
- The Eighties
- Vampires
- Hitchcock and Hellspawn
- Franken-zombies
- Spooky little (mostly nineties) girl
And then there’s today’s category:
- Man Crush Monday Monster Mash
I threw in three movies, two of which feature men who are not, let’s call it, hideously deformed. Should Aaron die in a freak gasoline fight incident that kills him quickly and painlessly, after a polite mourning period, I would let both of them take me to a gentle seafood dinner.
Are there shivers down your spine left?
Doctor Sleep (2019)
The movie? A sequel to both the film and the novel, The Shining. I’ve seen the original Kubrickian classic more than three times by now, and it is possibly one of my favorites. It’s so stylish and chilling. I know it was a bear to make, but it clearly worked in their favor. The sequel stars Obi Wan, I mean Ewan, McGregor, so I needed even less convincing to finally sit down and see this one (I had plans to see it in theatres but then life happened and there’s no time like the present am I right). Kenobi McGregor plays Dan “Danny” Torrance, some thirty five years after the events of the first novel/film. A recovering alcoholic using his “shining” to comfort hospice patients in their final moments, Dan is thrust back into the horrors of his childhood when he inadvertently befriends a young girl with the same gift.
I will admit, Doctor Sleep isn’t even half as creepy as it’s predecessor, but I think that’s okay. The film features tasteful flashbacks and homages to The Shining, without hammering it down your throat… or breaking down your bathroom door. Though it doesn’t rely heavily on jump scares, when there’s chills to be had, the same jolting sound effects are used in this movie as was in the original. A few other homage highlights include using the original theme of the movie (I believe it’s either trombone or french horn) when introducing the Warner Brothers title card, and to introduce the climactic third act. While I have an obvious soft spot for Ewan McGregor, the entire cast was incredible. I hope that the young actress who portrayed Abra, Kyliegh Curran, continues to act into adulthood. I was so impressed with her throughout the movie!
The flashbacks feature new actors portraying Danny, Wendy, and Jack (rather than using archival footage). They all do great jobs in capturing the characters’ auras. That said, while Alex Essoe did a wonderful job portraying Wendy, I found that she looked more like Abbi Jacobson from “Broad City,” at least in the face. It was hard to be on her level of terror when I kept thinking about Abbi after her dental surgery.
My Bloody Valentine (1981)
It took me an embarrassingly long amount of time to realize this was a Canadian slasher film. I thought it was just Minnesota small-town fun, but no, it was Canada! Someone said “So-rry” and I dismissed it! I am ashamed. ANYWAY. This film is the story of a tiny coal-mining town celebrating Valentine’s Day. However, twenty years prior, two coal mining supervisors left six miners in the mine to attend the annual Valentine’s Day dance, and an explosion left them trapped. Five miners died as the sixth resorted to cannibalism to survive. Twenty years later, he’s allegedly escaped from his mental institution, intent on casting revenge on the town that forgot the tragedy that drove him mad.
This film has everything: group showers, dumb twentysomethings, AN ACCIDENT IN A LAUNDROMAT. There’s a tense love triangle between two of the guys, one of whom left years ago, leaving his girlfriend to date his best friend. All I’ll say is: who finds mines sexy? Who thinks it’s fun to go down into a mine? I digress. The film has a few plot twists that let me be surprised by the ending! I like when I don’t know what’s going to happen next. I did fall asleep in the moments leading up to the third act, but I don’t know if that’s boredom or because a cat kept me up with cries for attention at five in the morning until eight in the morning. Doesn’t he know I need my beauty rest?
My Bloody Valentine offers plenty of shocking gore, though I’m sure it was much more shocking back in its heyday. I was definitely startled by a few of the more gruesome moments! I’m not a big fan of gore for gore’s sake, but when the characters aren’t super fascinating, it serves it’s purpose. For all that the characters weren’t as fun to watch as the ones in Doctor Sleep, I immediately felt sad and pity for the characters’ plight when I realized the happiness and excitement they felt at returning to the Valentine’s Day dance, which they had stopped holding after the mining accident, was not going to last. They were just a buncha nice Canadian folk trying to have a good time, ya know?
My Bloody Valentine (2009)
Oh yeah. They got a remake. The 2009 version of My Bloody Valentine stars the one, my one, the only, my only, Jensen Ackles. I’m not trying to be dramatic, but I would die for this man. He could stab me to death and my last words would be a bloody, choked out, “thank you.”
Where was I? Oh yeah, the 3D craze of the early 2000s. This movie was just stabbing after stabbing after gouging after throat rip. They took the gore of the original and kicked it up eleventy billion notches. Speaking of gore, this movie also starred Kerr Smith, who I immediately recognized. A quick Google search and yup, he was Carter in the original “Final Destination” movie, which is just :chef’s kiss: perfect early 2000s gore nightmares. Now THAT is nightmare inducing. It almost feels like a tribute to include him in this remake, since I feel like Final Destination was a benchmark, a blueprint, of what was to come.
This adaptation isn’t a full on remake, though character names and the general backstory remain the same. A lot of things are different in this movie compared to the original. I somehow knew the ending but was also surprised by it! Again, who just HANGS OUT in a mine? Could you remake this movie today? Do we still have tiny mining towns? Do they all just hang out and hook up in the mines when they aren’t working? I also would like to note that the beginning of the movie and the rest of the movie is ten years apart, and they manage to make everyone in the movie look ten years older, except Jensen Ackles. Jensen has looked exactly the same for ten years. Does he feed on souls to keep his handsome looks? Do they take volunteers for this ritual? Is there a permission slip or diet that must be followed prior to being sacrificed? Someone should look into this.
This was a fun way to jumpstart the month of Spooktober! I’m keeping things loosey goosey in terms of the order in which I want to digest each category of movies, but if it weren’t clear, I like not knowing what happens next.
With that, I’m going to start getting ready for bed. Let’s hope my nightmares are psycho spirit and psycho killer free!