“Bob’s Burgers” has made over ten episodes just for the holidays! Here’s a ranked list of the best “Bob’s Burgers” Christmas Episodes.
I already made a list of my favorite “Christmas Episodes.” However, I intentionally left out “Bob’s Burgers” from the list! They’ve made a holiday episode every year since season two. The Belchers make presents, sing carols, and… crash a secret Christmas rave? “Bob’s Burgers” Christmas Episodes have lots of heart, fun, and family. As a result, it’s hard to pick which episode is truly the best. As a result, I left things up to math!
I watched each of the “Bob’s Burgers” Christmas Episodes with a chart, ranking aspects of the episode from 1-5. The closer the episode to a perfect 40, the higher up on the list!
How I Ranked the Episodes
- Quality of “side building pun” in opening credits. Is it funny? Does it feel like Christmas? Both?
- Quality of “exterminator truck pun” in opening credits. See above qualifications of humor and Christmas.
That’s ten potential points in the first twenty seconds! - The “Burger of the Day” pun! Again, how good is the pun, how Christmas-y is the pun?
- Potential for the Burger Taste. How does the “Burger of the Day” actually sound? Would I eat it?
- Overall funniness. Did I laugh out loud?
- The Festive Factor. How Christmas-y is the episode? Is it just snowing outside, or do the Belchers have to save Christmas?
- Does it warm the heart? If things don’t end with a good metaphorical (or literal) hug, that’s points off!
- Bonus points! This was a wild card of sorts for casting, characters, and spontaneous fun.
The latest of the “Bob’s Burgers” Christmas Episodes aired last night, so this list is hot off the presses!
“Bob’s Burgers” Christmas Episodes, RANKED
10. Episode Name: Have Yourself a Maily Linda Christmas, Season 10, Episode 10
In this episode, Linda takes on a temp job at the post office to earn a few more dollars in the family Christmas budget. While sorting boxes, a man stops by at closing time, desperate to get a package on a truck to be delivered on Christmas Day. When the post officers show nonchalance about the delayed package arrival, Linda takes it upon herself to save the day! Meanwhile, Tina helps Bob keep the in-laws at bay, while Gene and Louise scramble to find a last-minute present for Tina.
The Scoring:
Side Building Pun: 2
Exterminator Pun: 3
Burger of the Day Pun: NO BURGER. WHAT A DISAPPOINTMENT.
Potential for Burger Taste: CAN’T TASTE A BURGER THAT DOESN’T EXIST, BOB.
How Funny is it: 3
The Festive Factor: 5
How Heartwarming is it: 3
Wild Card Points: Plus 1 for Tina singing Christmas songs incorrectly, plus two for seeing Linda’s parents and her sister, Gayle
Overall Notes: I love how much Linda cares, and seeing her extended family is always a treat! However, a “Bob’s Burgers” with no burgers? Shameful!
OVERALL POINTS: 19
9. Episode Name: The Last Gingerbread House on the Left, Season 7, Episode 7
Linda’s feeling the Christmas spirit! She escorts the Belcher kids and Teddy around the town in song. She hopes that singing carols to others will inspire others to join them, preferably with hot cocoa! However, their adventures begin on the nicer side of town, as they drop Bob off at a fancy mansion, where he competes with Mr. Fischoeder and his eccentric friends in a gingerbread house building contest. If Bob loses, he gets free rent! If he wins, he gets to take his kids to see a baby albino polar bear! The stakes couldn’t be higher.
The Scoring:
Side Building Pun: 0 (NO OPENING CREDITS)
Exterminator Pun: 0 (NO OPENING CREDITS)
Burger of the Day Pun: 4
Potential for Burger Taste: 3
How Funny is it: 4
The Festive Factor: 5
How Heartwarming is it: 4
Wild Card Points: Plus 1 for cute albino polar bear, plus 1 for “Eyes Wide Shut” esque potential, but it’s really a secret gingerbread house building contest. ‘Tis a fun bait n switch.
Overall Notes: This hits a lot of the Christmas notes. The family celebrates, they open their hearts to a kindly former singer who lives alone, and they learn the value of sharing!
OVERALL POINTS: 22
8. Episode Name: Nice-Capades, Season 6, Episode 5
Uh-oh! It’s the most wonderful time of the year, but Louise finds herself in hot water! After hogging the massage chair at the mall, displacing Santa, she finds herself, Gene. and Tina on the naughty list! Louise puts together an impromptu ice-show, a “Nice Capades,” to convince Santa that they deserve more than coal this year!
The Scoring:
Side Building Pun: 4
Exterminator Pun: 1
Burger of the Day Pun: 1
Potential for Burger Taste: 2
How Funny is it: 4
The Festive Factor: 5
How Heartwarming is it: 5
Wild Card Points: Plus 1 for “Code Blitzen” (the kids accidentally spill cookies and milk on Santa), and plus 1 for just seeing my little guy, Regular Sized Rudy.
Overall Notes: Edith and Harold Cranwinkle appear just to give Bob a hard time about crafts. It brings good laughs! However, Louise’s disingenuity is a bummer. Her lack of sympathy and desire to lie isn’t always cute and fun. On the other hand, she DOES learn her lesson, and the pep talk Santa gives her warms my heart.
OVERALL POINTS: 24
7. Episode Name: Better off Sled, Season 9, Episode 10
It’s a snow day! Gene, Tina, and Louise head to the only hill in town ideal for sledding, bringing their friends in tow. However, Louise’s arch-nemesis (a high school boy named Logan) has set up shop at the bottom of the hill. Blocking the kids’ ability to sled with a snowball fight, Louise takes drastic measures. Meanwhile, Linda has decided to knit the kids scarves for Christmas! But will Bob outshine her with his natural knitting skills?
The Scoring:
Side Building Pun: 4
Exterminator Pun: 5
Burger of the Day Pun: 3 (Two burgers featured in this episode! One pun doesn’t make sense, but the other one is pretty good)
Potential for Burger Taste: 3 (Once again, averaged out the two burgers. One sounds good, the other just okay)
How Funny is it: 3
The Festive Factor: 2
How Heartwarming is it: 3
Wild Card Points: Plus 3 for active role for Regular Sized Rudy. I just love him.
Overall Notes: The energy of the final snowball fight fills me with joy! However, you could replace Linda knitting scarves “for Christmas” with “for winter,” and no plot would change! Not Christmas-y enough!
OVERALL POINTS: 26
6. Episode Name: God Rest Ye Merry Gentle-Mannequins, Season 3, Episode 9
Bob inherits a storage unit from his uncle! However, inside the storage unit, the family finds Chet, a squatter who used to work for Bob’s uncle. They allow him to stay in their basement until Christmas ends. Throughout his visit, he creates beautiful Christmas displays in the window! However, things take a dark turn when Chet tells him about his lost love… a mannequin named Nadine.
The Scoring:
Side Building Pun: 5
Exterminator Pun: 4
Burger of the Day Pun: 3
Potential for Burger Taste: 2
How Funny is it: 3
The Festive Factor: 5
How Heartwarming is it: 2
Wild Card Points: Plus 4 points for a nice montage set to “Father Christmas”.
Overall Notes: The Christmas displays are fun, but the mental illness of Chet is uncomfy. It’s like “Lars and the Real Girl,” but worse. Also, spoiler alert: Chet squats in the storage unit and burdens the family on Christmas, but he has a full Manhattan apartment? To boot, the shattered reality display Chet provides is super disturbing, even for a cartoon!
OVERALL POINTS: 28
5. Episode Name: Christmas In the Car, Season 4, Episode 8
It’s Christmas Eve and the Belcher family has no tree! It’s off to the closest open tree farm to grab what scraps remain. However, on the way home, the Belcher family finds themselves in a death chase against a suspicious truck… shaped like a candy cane.
The Scoring:
Side Building Pun: 4
Exterminator Pun: 5
Burger of the Day Pun: 0 (ANOTHER EPISODE WITH NO BURGERS!)
Potential for Burger Taste: 0 (WE DON’T KNOW)
How Funny is it: 5
The Festive Factor: 5
How Heartwarming is it: 4
Wild Card Points: Plus 2 points for snow falling in the opening credits! Another three points for one of the funniest opening sequences/plot providers of the entire series.
Overall Notes: The Dutch baby. Multiple Christmas trees. The scene where Teddy gets trapped in the fridge (the art is CLEAN)! It may not be number one by the numbers, but of all the “Bob’s Burgers” Christmas Episodes, this one is my favorite!
OVERALL POINTS: 28
4. Episode Name: Yachty or Nice, Season 11, Episode 10
It’s a boat party! Bob’s Burgers gets invited to cater the local yacht club’s annual Christmas party. However, Bob finds himself unable to enjoy the high-class clientele when he discovers that his name was provided to the yacht club by his rival, Jimmy Pesto. During the party, Teddy plays Santa Claus for the kids in line for presents! The Belcher kids (well, mostly Louise) play that to their advantage, in hopes of scoring a gift without waiting in a long line!
The Scoring:
Side Building Pun: 3
Exterminator Pun: 3
Burger of the Day Pun: 4
Potential for Burger Taste: 5
How Funny is it: 3
The Festive Factor: 4
How Heartwarming is it: 4
Wild Card Points: Plus 1 point for jingly sounding bells in the opening credits, plus two points for the irony. Jimmy Pesto does a nice thing, albeit for selfish reasons. It’s a fun juxtaposition… considering.
Overall Notes: The episode has good shenanigans and relies on the pre-existing dynamics of each character! We love to see growth. I also love when the Belcher kids get paired off with Teddy. That’s a guaranteed good time, for any season!
OVERALL POINTS: 29
3. Episode Name: The Bleakening, Season 8, episodes 6-7
We got ourselves a two-parter! Linda wants to throw an impromptu Christmas party, at which the top of the family Christmas tree gets taken! In fear that “The Bleaken” will return for their Christmas presents, the Belcher kids decide to solve the mystery of the missing tree… among other missing holiday items!
The Scoring:
Side Building Pun: 0 (NO OPENING CREDITS)
Exterminator Pun: 0 (NO OPENING CREDITS)
Burger of the Day Pun: 5 (two Burgers of the Day, both excellent puns)
Potential for Burger Taste: 5 (both burgers sound delicious and fun)
How Funny is it: 3
The Festive Factor: 5
How Heartwarming is it: 3
Wild Card Points: This episode strikes the motherlode for wild card points. Three points for fun guest stars (John Early, Todrick Hall, AND ADAM DRIVER?!), two points for tunes, and 3 for a great message.
Overall Notes: This is a full length, hour long episode, with music, a fun story, and an underlying message about acceptance. In addition, there’s a touch of the spooks! Beware the Bleaken!
OVERALL POINTS: 29
2. Episode Name: Gene’s Christmas Break, Season 12, Episode 10
It’s Christmas, which for Gene means only one thing: Christmas music! He plays Christmas DJ, blaring the same Christmas albums all day long, all month long. However, tragedy strikes when he accidentally shatters his favorite record! Can this Christmas treasure be replaced?
The Scoring:
Side Building Pun: 5
Exterminator Pun: 4
Burger of the Day Pun: 4 (FOUR. DIFFERENT. BURGERS! Averaged out each pun)
Potential for Burger Taste: 5 (all burgers sound delicious and fun)
How Funny is it: 3
The Festive Factor: 5
How Heartwarming is it: 3
Wild Card Points: The opening credits earns one point for light snowfall. In addition, plus two for FOUR different burgers in the episode, all of which sound pretty darn yum.
Overall Notes: Not the funniest, not the most heartwarming, but I love that they go for the burgers in this one. Plus, a spotlight gets put on Gene, and those are usually a hit or miss. This one’s a hit!
OVERALL POINTS: 32
1. Episode Name: Father of the Bob, Season 5, Episode 6
It’s Christmas, and it’s time to head to Big Bob’s Diner… AKA, Bob’s Dad’s diner. Bob turned down the chance to work for and with his father, opting instead to open his own restaurant. Their relationship has been strained ever since. Things take a turn for the competitive when the Bobs decide to have a burger off, where one of Big Bob’s regulars can taste-test who has the best burger. During the burger-off, the kids are downstairs, making their father a present last minute with whatever they can find in Big Bob’s Basement.
The Scoring:
Side Building Pun: 5
Exterminator Pun: 4
Burger of the Day Pun: 4 (FOUR. DIFFERENT. BURGERS! Averaged out each pun)
Potential for Burger Taste: 5 (all burgers sound delicious and fun)
How Funny is it: 4
The Festive Factor: 5
How Heartwarming is it: 4
Wild Card Points: This episode has multiple burgers, but only one of them fills the festive category. Between the burger ideas and the father-son dynamic, it’s good to get some Bobby Burger backstories. The kids making last minute gifts for Bob, with Gene’s bean bath, is good bean fun. The review reveal and the line-dancing scene provide the episode’s heart and vulnerability. Burgers are great, but nothing beats family.
OVERALL POINTS: 35
To clarify: numbers don’t lie! However, I cannot deny that my favorite episode falls in the middle of this numerically ranked list. My “wild card” points could be meaningless to the average viewer! That is to say, my numbers may mean differently to other people. Or, maybe it’s a lesson that the BEST thing doesn’t have to be a favorite thing! To clarify, I LOVE “Father of the Bob,” and I’d put it as my second favorite. But the moment where the family skids out of control, screaming in terror, while Louise screams in pure joy, is one of the best in the series. To conclude, if you’re wondering which “Bob’s Burgers” Christmas Episodes to watch, this is an optimum “pecking” order!